While Brent and Melissa may be a small-town couple, their troubles are anything but. Life for the happy couple started rather simply, at a pub over a game of pool. It’s when they started the wedding planning process that things got, um, complicated. You see, they found out Melissa was pregnant – something they weren’t planning for. Now, not only are they planning the wedding, but also Melissa is nearly five months along. Seems like the perfect time to renovate their house, you say? That’s happening, too. Talk about a trifecta of life-changing milestones!

So where do things stand at the moment? Well, both their minister and their DJ have bailed, they have no marriage license, and a bunch of invitations got lost in the mail. While this might be enough to drive them to drink, the winemaker in charge of the wedding favors has left the business, unfortunately. As if all that wasn’t enough, Melissa’s dream dress is a nightmare, since it’s now too small. Melissa and Brent have been living in a world of denial where “everything is okay,” and now it’s time to wake up and smell the reality. With two weeks to go until Melissa waddles, er, walks down the aisle, our blushing bride is both knocked and fed up, which is making the groom want to give up. “I just want it to be over!” he cries. As Shrek II’s Fairy Godmother would say, “Happiness is just a teardrop away” – so here comes our own fairy godplanner to the rescue!

Jane meets Melissa and Brent at the reception hall, “I hear you have more on your plate than you can handle.” She’s not very impressed with the site. They have no florist, and Melissa isn’t exactly sure what the decorations are going to be, since Brent’s mother is in charge of that. Unfortunately, future mom-in law is known to be “over the top” when decorating is involved, so Jane is understandably concerned. And she should be – we’re talking fake flowers here. Lots and lots of them. [“Is ‘over-the-top’ the nice way of saying ‘tacky’?” – Cylon Bride] Has the couple laid eyes on the hall’s linen, china, or flatware? Again, Melissa and Brent have no clue what they look like. Jane asks how many guests they expect – and surprise, they have no idea. Since some of their invitations got lost in the mail, “about 200, give or take” is as close as they can get. Fifty people haven’t RSVP’d, though, so it could be ugly.

Speaking of things getting ugly, it’s off to Stop #2 on the Wedding Disaster tour – St. James’ Church – to check out the ceremony location. Melissa and Brent don’t actually have a ceremony planned. Their minister went on medical leave and they haven’t bothered to coordinate the service with the church. Um ... no ceremony, no marriage, folks. Just something to think about. Moving on, Jane wants to know – how will the pews be decorated? With some sort of flower or ribbon arrangement. Well, or so they think. On every pew, or every other one? Shrugs all around. Aisle runner? Not yet. So Melissa and Brent have nothing definite, as far as the ceremony is concerned. At least they’re in the right place to pray for a wedding miracle!

Jane knows she has her work cut out for her, “If I heard ‘I don’t know’ once, I heard it 20 times.” Jane has over twenty years of planning experience and has seen it all. So when she drops the gem, “This is one of the biggest dilemmas I’ve ever had to solve,” that’s saying something. If Melissa was stressed out before, imagine what that does for her state of mind! Not one to waste time, Jane puts their plan of attack on the board, and gets Melissa and Brent to make some decisions.

Once they pick their jaws up off the floor, it’s time for Melissa and Brent to get to work finding an officiant, creating a reception floor plan that will seat 200 comfortably, meet with mom to see her event design plan – and the list goes on. Jane inquires about their favors. Believe it or not, they have this one done: CDs. Jane’s not a fan, “CDs? How novel!” Melissa and Brent had also planned to give every guest a bottle of the wine they made, but the new wine shop owner wants to charge them $400 (plus they need to put the labels on themselves). “They think it’ll take a couple hours to put labels on 200 bottles. Yeah, right.” Do they have their attire? That hits a sore spot with Melissa. She adored Princess Di’s dress because of the 25-foot train, and she looked long and hard for the perfect dress. But now it doesn’t fit. The thought of dress shopping again at this late date is a huge stress on her. But no fear, they have three wishes; let’s just hope they use them wisely. Melissa and Brent actually thought they were “a little bit more ahead of the game” than they actually are. I’d say the word delusional about sums it up.